dissapointed..

Have you ever tried so hard to get smth
and it turn out just the opposite from what you expected?
you'll never know or understand how it feel..
It's the worst feeling ever.

do you hav a knife?
or smth sharp?
i felt like dying now
to escape from this disaster
why?
MUSTthis happen to me?
why?
MUST i always be the one to be the failure?

i want to quit
why can't i just be who i wanna be?
doing all the things i like
breaking the rules
don't need to care about anything..

what's the point from continuing?
i've failed,
FAILED from every thingthat i've been tryon to get...
should i cry?
even if i cried
it can't change anything..

friends tried to comfort me,
but it just remind me of how stupid i am
" maybe u'll do good in other subject" they said..
BUT
they never noe...

It's like a curse..
one which can't be reversed
It's like a sickness
one that CAN'T be cure
maybe i'll be like this forever,
TOO dissapointed and tired to get up

i've gave up
from every thing i've ever wanted..
i've learned my lesson
i'll not made the same mistake again.

i've failed my family
my friends and myself..
i tried to cheer up,
but how could i?
when i'm the one who did the mess..

MAYBE GOD want this to happen
MAYBE this 's a test for me..
MAYBE i should get up..
BUT not now..
not in this test..
i;ve done my best
WHY should i care the rest?

so,
maybe i'll let time do the work
i WONT ALLOW this to happen again..
sometimes...
there're things we NEED to LEARN to LET GO..
to get smth better in return
BECAUSE GOD will ALWAYS GIVES US THE BEST..



* IT TURN OUT TO BETTER INTHE END